~ For how long

I can't be myself
I can't live
I can't be
I can't die
I can't jump
I can't smile
Because I can't fake
I can't stay
But I can't go
I can't be myself
I can't deny
I can't close my eyes
I can't open my eyes
I can't say
You can't understand
I can't cry
I can't be weak
I can't scream
I can't be strong
I can't live
I can't die
I can't stay
I can't run away
I can't buy
I can't do
I can't stay still
I can't feel
I can't let me cry
Because I know I will not stop
I can't put me down
 I can't put me up
I can't like
I don't know to love
I don't know
I don't know how stop
How can I be so contradictory
How I let my life be like this
I can't live
I can't die
I don't know if I can be strong enough
I don't know how long more I can be strong enough
I can't handle it
I can't cry
I don't know how
Make it work
I don't know if I can
I don't know if I can't be weak
I don't know how long
I can stand it !?